


One (1) Dog On the Moon

by monogramsalarm



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, ITS A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE, it's not angsty in any way, it's super happy, magnus hides a puppy in his room, wow maddie you wrote something fluffy for once?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-26 04:24:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13850049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monogramsalarm/pseuds/monogramsalarm
Summary: Magnus tries to hide a puppy on the Bureau of Balance headquarters. Y'know, typical situational humor.





	One (1) Dog On the Moon

Magnus stepped out of the glass sphere, making sure his jacket was zipped up securely. He  _ wanted  _ to try to smuggle something bigger, but this would absolutely do. Avi waved to him from across the room, wiping the grease from his forehead.

“Hey, Mags! Didja have a good time down there?” He set the wrench he was holding down on top of the sphere he was tinkering around with.

“Yeah!” Magnus answered a little too quickly. “I mean, uh, yeah, oh just the  _ best  _ time but I am so beat! Gotta go take a nap, y’know?” He laughed a little nervously, trying not to draw attention to the wiggling form under his coat. Luckily, Avi was far enough away that he didn’t notice anything.

“Cool cool, we still on for poker tomorrow night? Hopefully Davenport doesn’t clean up again and gives the rest of us a chance.” Avi chuckled, putting his hands on his hips.

“Totally! I’ll be there!” Magnus grinned, waving as he walked out of the hangar. The minute he was out of sight, Magnus dashed back to their apartment. Once inside the elevator down to their living quarters, Magnus unzipped his jacket and a smile instantly lit up his face upon seeing the little wiggly puppy who couldn’t stop wagging her tail. “Hey, little girl!” Magnus’ voice raised an octave as he scratched the little scruffy pup’s head. “Did you know that you’re the cutest little thing I’ve ever seen? Yes, you absolutely are!” He cooed, thrilled that his plan to smuggle a puppy onto the moon base worked out. The elevator opened as he was still talking to her and heard a confused voice.

“Are you talking to your dick?!” Magnus’ head snapped up upon hearing Taako call out to him. He ran over, kneeling in front of Taako.

“Okay, I did a bad thing and you have to swear on my goldfish, Steven Q. Fletcher, that you’ll never tell anyone. Got it, Taako?” The puppy poked her head out of Magnus’ jacket, causing Taako to gasp.

“Oh my god that is the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” Taako reached out to pet her as her whole body wiggled excitedly. “You got a deal, my dude. Snitches get stitches and all that. Now let me hold this tiny puppy!” He reached out, wiggling his fingers for emphasis. Magnus handed her over, smiling at them.

“Be careful, okay? I don’t want anything to happen to her,” he watched as Taako immediately started using a higher voice and scratched behind her ear.

“Does this little one have a name? Also, where did you get a fucking puppy?!” Taako held her close to him, instantly eyeing Magnus.

“I haven’t named her yet. And I’ve been looking for puppies for weeks, I just kept it quiet.” Taako set her on the ground and the two lay there, watching her run around. “I’m trying to determine her personality before I make a choice for her name. You can name her if you think of something good, you’re an accomplice now.” He smiled at Taako. They heard the sound of their doorbell, which meant someone was coming down the elevator.

“Magnus… Which day was the Director coming to visit…?” Taako turned to him, the smile dropping from his face.

“Well, shit.” Magnus leapt to his feet, scooping the puppy into his arms.

“We have, like, 30 seconds until she’s down here, what the  _ fuck  _ do we do with the puppy, Magnus?!” Taako looked around the room. Magnus carefully set her down under the couch, causing Taako to run his hand down his face in annoyance. “Yeah, that’s gonna work cuz we’re in a fucking comedy show!” He groaned, then heard the elevator make a pleasant  _ ding  _ before the doors opened and the Director stood there, looking at their panicked expressions.

“Are you two… Okay?” She raised an eyebrow. Taako nodded, brushing any dirt and dog hair off of his pants.

“A-okay! Cool beans, we’re all good here.” He leaned nonchalantly against the couch. “How are you doing?”

“I’m doing fine,” she paused, noticing Magnus’ eyes constantly looking to the couch. “What are you hiding under there?” Taako slipped in surprise, falling down next to the couch. The little wiggly puppy scampered out from under the couch, licking every inch of Taako’s face as he giggled. She immediately turned to Magnus, crossing her arms. He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“Would you believe me if I said she followed me home?” His nervous smile wavered, seeing her disappointed expression. He sighed, looking down. “I’m sorry, I just… Really wanted a dog. I’ll take her back tomorrow.” She walked over to where Taako was under attack from the love of the over-excited puppy, kneeling beside him and scooping the pup up in her arms. The puppy continuously licked her cheek, getting so excited that there was another person to love. Lucretia’s mouth twitched into a smile before turning her over and rubbing her tummy.

“Now who’s this?” She cooed softly before Taako stood up, getting an idea.

“That’s Lucretia.” He grinned as she turned to him. “We makes her after you because you’re just  _ such  _ a great person and we just needed to give the most perfect little dog the perfect… Name?” He smiled through his bullshit and Lucretia’s smile got bigger. Magnus nodded in agreement, walking over to them.

“Yep, but we just call her Lucy for short. Can we keep her?” He grinned, feeling like a little kid who brought home a stray dog. Lucretia looked between them, then sighed in resignation and nodded.

“I guess you can keep her. But you pick up after her outside, and keep her on a leash, because I don’t want her running off the side of the moon.” She handed the puppy back to Magnus. “Deal?”

“Yeah, thanks mom,” Taako snorted, sitting down on the couch. Magnus grinned widely, pulling her into a hug.

“Oh, um, yep. This is happening,” Lucretia patted his back uncomfortably. After Magnus let go, she walked back towards the elevator, that same cautious smile still on her face. She turned back to them, smiling to herself. “Just remember… If you neglect your responsibilities, her cuteness is all mine.” She raised an eyebrow somewhat playfully before the elevator doors closed. Magnus turned to Taako and hugged Lucy close to him.

“WE HAVE A PUPPY!” He yelled, feeling the most excited he’d felt in a long time. Taako grinned widely, petting her on the head.

“You get to stay with us!” He gasped, looking up at Magnus. “We can dress her up in cute little outfits.”

“Taako… That’s the greatest thing you’ve said all day.” Magnus put an arm around him. “Let’s go get her some cute little fuckin’ booties.”


End file.
